If you are in trouble or thinking of taking your life.
please reach out to a loved one.  If you don't feel comfortable please call the number below or 911.


Suicide Prevention Hotline:  1-800-273-8255
 

 
March 19, 2016 changed me and my family's life forever.  My husband Randy had been been suffering with extreme depression and pain from a work related injury for the last 10 days.  That evening Randy took his life in our home.  

His decision to commit suicide destroyed the family life that we all knew.  It threw me into a very deep dark pit of depression.  I didn't want to live.  The only thing that kept me alive at that time was my kids, my father and my friends.  I drew up whatever strength I had left in my body, got up and got busy.  I searched and did whatever therapy, natural remedy, activity etc.  I could find that I thought could bring life back into me and my kids again.  Now 5 years later, I am able to talk about it freely and teach you how you can have a good life again after trauma, severe mental illness and/or grief.  

I am a health and wellness professional of 33 years who owns multiple businesses, one being a gym.
I am not a doctor, psychiatrist or therapist.  I have lived through tremendous grief and continue to live with chronic depression. These tools that I am sharing below is what I have learned that has helped me., my children and my clients. 

Exercise:
Our bodies were made to move.  Sedentary lifestyles does more damage than cause you to gain weight.  Without movement our bodies do not have the opportunity to produce Serotonin and Endorphins, the pleasure chemicals, that our brain requires to feel good and alert. 
Getting at least 30 minutes of activity a day will help your body help your brain.

Supplements:
I take a number of supplements every day.  Some are to boost my immune system but the most important Vitamin that has now been suggested by psychiatrists and therapists is Vitamin D.

Vitamin D is the Sunshine Vitamin.  You get it from being out in the sun.  People who live in areas without a lot of sunshine are Vitamin D deficient.  There are a few ways to get Vitamin D into your body. 
Getting outside in the sun for at least 20 minutes.

An at-home UV Light that you can buy online. An over the counter supplement, I take a Vitamin D3 Supplement.  Vitamin D is not a water soluble vitamin which means your body does not excrete the excess if you take too much.  It can cause kidney issues if you do not follow the correct dosage. It is now recommended that we can take up to 5000 IU of Vitamin D.  However, if you do not feel well after taking that amount, listen to your body and take less. 

Healthy Food:
"You are what you eat."  Some of us are familiar with that phrase.  I kind of think it should say "You feel what you eat."  Junk food will make you feel bad physically and mentally.  I have noticed that I cry the most on days that I eat sugar.  I stopped eating sugar and my crying days became less. 
A well rounded diet filled with lean meats, fruit and veggies will help your body and your digestive system help your brain.  Your gut health is super important to keeping your brain healthy.  Taking care of your gut means eating healthy foods and staying away from the junk.  

Therapy: 
Therapy was the first thing that my kids and I did while we were trying to figure out how to navigate though our new lives. There are so many different types of therapy. Group, one on one, art, music, exercise and equine are the therapies that we have tried.  You may need to take a little time to find the right fit.  Don't give up.  If one thing does not work keep searching.  

The most beneficial for me was one on one therapy.  I believe that we need to talk out our issues.  I feel that talking to a person that doesn't have a history with me or an emotional connection is very helpful.  You really can release a lot of emotions and talk freely when you are not afraid of hurting your therapist feelings. 

Community:
Covid has been rough on us and our ability to get together with our friends.  Things are starting to get better.  Getting together with people does our brain good.  Zoom and other telecommunication avenues are available now.  I actually started a monthly family call so we can stay connected even if we can't physically be together. I has been a lot of fun.  Find ways to get together with your people in a comfortable way for them and you. 

God:
For 2 years I was very angry with God for the way that Randy died.  Suicide death is different than any other because it is caused by your loved ones hand.  I felt deserted, guilty for not being able to help him more, angry that he left us and angry that God did not answer my desperate prayer to save him. My anger towards God brought me deeper and deeper into a pit of darkness and I could feel that I was losing myself. One day in my car I was crying.  I was tired of feeling dark and heavy and just wanted to feel better.  I pulled my car over and yelled out "Ok God.  I give up!  I can't do this without you.  I give my life and healing to you."  Almost immediately I felt a shroud lifted off of my body.  I felt a shred of hope.  From that day on I pray these words every day. "Lord, please give me wisdom and strength today to live the life you intend for me."  I truly feel that giving my life back to God has been one of the most important steps I have taken to heal and reclaim my life.  No matter what history you have had with God, He loves you and forgives you.  Take Him back into your life and continue to open your eyes to see which way He will lead you to a good life. 


If you have question about anything that I have talked about here please 

 

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